YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize