whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
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