What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
