The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Couch. On fire.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
