I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Randomize
