I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
