69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
