Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
