i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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