Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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