we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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