Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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