just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
