what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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