your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
