Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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