You really coming over, don't trick.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Randomize