He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
