I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
