So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
