I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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