I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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