i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
