There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I cut my penus on the lid.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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