Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
