WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
