i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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