I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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