16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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