Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
