guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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