also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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