I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
