So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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