help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
