i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
