I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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