As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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