I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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