last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He's on the porch naked. Help.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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