You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
