So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
