Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize