I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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