You really coming over, don't trick.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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