i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
