He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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