he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
