You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
