Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Randomize