He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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