im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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