this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
