dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
